It’s Wellness Journey Wednesday, and today I feel compelled to talk about something different.

About how hard it can be to be a woman who truly loves herself.

It’s taken me years.

I just saw a reel from my friend and fellow Trussville Moms admin, Jordan Merrell, encouraging women not to let body image issues keep them from booking the photo session.

Jordan’s a photographer.

And y’all… that message hit me right in the chest.

Because that was me.

After years of infertility and the depression that followed, I hated what had happened to my body. I refused maternity photos with my first baby in 2020. We took almost no family photos for the next four years because I was so ashamed of how I looked.

When I became pregnant with our second son, I finally agreed to maternity photos with Jordan. We knew he would be our last baby, and after the unimaginable journey it took to bring him here—including an ectopic pregnancy, loss, heartbreak, and more prayers than I can count—I didn’t want to miss that moment too.

When I got the photos back, I liked a few of them.

But if I’m honest, I was still focused on my body.

Since then, we’ve only done one other family session. There are so many moments I wish I’d captured. Birthday parties. Ordinary afternoons. Seasons of life that came and went while I was waiting to feel good enough to be in the picture.

The thing is, when I look at those maternity photos now, I don’t spend much time thinking about my body.

I look at my belly and think about the little boy inside, getting ready to meet us.

I think about everything it took to get him here.

I think about the way his big brother points at those photos now and says, “That was you in there.”

And suddenly the things I was so worried about seem so small.

Photos have a way of preserving what memory eventually lets fade. They capture the people we love, the seasons we survive, and the stories we’re living before we realize they’re stories.

I spent years believing I needed to love everything about myself before I deserved to be photographed.

I don’t believe that anymore.

You don’t have to love every inch of your body to deserve a place in your family’s memories.

You don’t have to reach a goal weight.

You don’t have to wait until you’re more confident.

You don’t have to become someone else.

You are already part of the story.

And one day, the people who love you won’t be looking at those photos wondering what size you were.

They’ll just be grateful you’re in them.

*Side note: I don’t think I ever even posted this photo online because I hated it so much back then.

The truth is, I still struggle. I still judge myself way harder than I should. I’m still learning.

But I’m trying to remind myself that what matters most isn’t what I weighed or how I looked. It’s the moment. It’s the people in it.

And that’s what I want my boys to know too. I never want them to believe they have to be perfect before they’re worthy of being seen, celebrated, or remembered.

Life is happening right now. Don’t miss the picture while you’re waiting to feel good enough to be in it.